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What if your adorable 10 year old wrote you this letter on his/her 11th birthday?
Dear Mom and Dad or Dad and Dad or Mom and Mom Dad or Mom, (choose 1 or more) I am 11 today, and still rather innocent. I know all of the words to the edgiest songs and I sing along, but I don’t know yet what they mean. I dance with sexy moves and know the latest slang, and lots of people think it is cute. I am just noticing my “pre-teen” body and suddenly care what I look like, a lot! I am noticing that you are not as perfect as I thought you were when I was younger, and you are noticing that I am not as willing to please you. Suddenly, I would rather be with my friends than you, be texting rather than socializing at a family event … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips
Concerns, Tough Questions and Solutions for Parenting Teens-Part 2
Me and and many of my colleagues carry a deep concern and are asking tough questions about why self harm and eating disorders are on the increase for our teens and young adults. Are we falling short as parents, teachers, grandparents, aunts, uncles, sports coaches and role models in encouraging living values and virtues in our children of compassion, empathy, self-reliance, honesty, perseverance, gratitude, and appreciation? Are our children and teens so saturated with acquired things and constant entertainment, that they have no time to relax? Are we teaching stress and achievement neurosis and ego driven competition as a life curriculum? Are we ourselves modeling materialism, multitasking, and technological idolatry? Are we using the current “economic hard times” as an excuse for pushing our kids harder and harder? Are we teaching them what to … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips
Parenting our Teens; Helping them with their Stress- Part 1
This article is about how stress causes problems in our teens like self harm, eating disorders, depression, anxiety and suicide In case you don’t have time to read this, but want the information, here you go: Spend enough quality time with your teens and pre-teens so that you continue to know them and have healthy attachment through these difficult years. Have a clear view of what the parameters of “normal” are for your child, and pay attention to behaviors that call out for help. Sometimes these behaviors will seem like they are intended to alienate you, but don’t fall for it. Not being a therapist or a clinician, I see it as appropriate for me to refrain from description, diagnosis, analysis or suggested remedy for these challenges, and for the rise in their … Read entire article »
Filed under: Blessings, children's music studies, Common Ground, Featured, gratitude, Jewish Community Events, Oakland A's, parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips, Relationships, self confidence, summer camp, teen driving
30 is the new 10, or at best 20; Raising an adult child
I recently had lunch with my old buddy and his 35 year-old son. As we were celebrating that “50” is the “new 60”, and “50” is the “new 40”, he chimed in, yeah and “30 is the new 10”. We all laughed at that comment! There are many, many young adults between the ages of 18-35 who have successfully moved into adulthood. (How To Be and Adult) and my blog 18 steps to becoming an adult. If your grown child falls into the category of being a true adult, is self-supporting and self-empowered, then kudos to you for your contribution as a parents, and kudos to them for stepping up and showing up. This article may not apply to them or you. However, if you are in the growing group of parents … Read entire article »
Filed under: gratitude, parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips, Relationships, self confidence