ParentingPanicButton » Entries tagged with "parenting"
Concerns, Tough Questions and Solutions for Parenting Teens-Part 2
Me and and many of my colleagues carry a deep concern and are asking tough questions about why self harm and eating disorders are on the increase for our teens and young adults. Are we falling short as parents, teachers, grandparents, aunts, uncles, sports coaches and role models in encouraging living values and virtues in our children of compassion, empathy, self-reliance, honesty, perseverance, gratitude, and appreciation? Are our children and teens so saturated with acquired things and constant entertainment, that they have no time to relax? Are we teaching stress and achievement neurosis and ego driven competition as a life curriculum? Are we ourselves modeling materialism, multitasking, and technological idolatry? Are we using the current “economic hard times” as an excuse for pushing our kids harder and harder? Are we teaching them what to … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips
30 is the new 10, or at best 20; Raising an adult child
I recently had lunch with my old buddy and his 35 year-old son. As we were celebrating that “50” is the “new 60”, and “50” is the “new 40”, he chimed in, yeah and “30 is the new 10”. We all laughed at that comment! There are many, many young adults between the ages of 18-35 who have successfully moved into adulthood. (How To Be and Adult) and my blog 18 steps to becoming an adult. If your grown child falls into the category of being a true adult, is self-supporting and self-empowered, then kudos to you for your contribution as a parents, and kudos to them for stepping up and showing up. This article may not apply to them or you. However, if you are in the growing group of parents … Read entire article »
Filed under: gratitude, parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips, Relationships, self confidence
The Problem with Losing Weight
The problem with losing weight is that under most circumstances, with the exception of illness and eating disorders, we view it as positive, even though it contains the word losing. It is peculiar how we use words. A similar situation is occurs with the phrase falling in love. Aren’t we really rising to love? Falling seems so helpless. Here is how I turn losing weight into a gain that actually helps the pounds stay off. In my family there is a prevailing tendency to gain weight easily. It is in our genes, and to make matters more difficult, we are stress eaters, recreational eaters and we so often love what we shouldn’t eat. Many of us are continually putting on weight, taking it off, putting it on again, and the losing it. It is a … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips
A response to the massacre at a grammar school in Connecticut
Why does it take an unthinkable, horrific tragedy to put things in perspective? Everyday challenges and struggles are our usual drama. In parenting children, pre- teens and teens, we rarely encounter a day that is not filled with frustrating issues, incidents and difficult decisions. They seem big. We make them big. We make them huge. We treat them as if our lives depend on their resolution. We spar, bicker and argue. We criticize and blame each other and try to make sense of the constant trials and tribulations of parenting. We worry about finances, fearfully anticipate the cost of an unexpected car repair. We struggle with the eventuality of how we are going to pay for our teen’s college education. We multitask until we don’t know up from down, forward from backwards, right … Read entire article »
Filed under: Uncategorized
Parenting Teens at 17
Being a teen is a complicated place to be right now. Being a parent of a teen is a delicate place to be. It often seems that the world is getting harder and more complex for each generation. As a parent of teens, I often wonder how I would feel about the world at this moment. If I Were 17 Sure…. I’d be angry too, if I were 17. I’d be angry about the world I am being given. I’d be frustrated with the stubbornness of change. I’d be disappointed that it has gotten to his point. I’d be let down that my college loans will haunt me for years. I’d be disenchanted about the dreams I had as a young child. I’d be discouraged about my future and my dreams. I’d be apathetic about changing the world. I’d be … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips
Effective Parenting and Exhaustion–Part 2
Now that you have taken the first step toward effective parenting and you have someone you can talk to, take the second step towards effective parenting. Decide what is working and what isn’t. Then choose one thing that isn’t working. Let’s say it is the morning that is the biggest problem. Bring your family together (make sure your partner is on board). Do this after dinner the night before. Let them know what the drill will be in the morning, what the tasks will be and when the “bus leaves”. Make sure each child knows his/her tasks and has them in writing. Give the kids one wakeup call at the time you think is appropriate, and let them know they will get only one wakeup call. Do not micromanage them, although you … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting tips
Effective Parenting and Exhaustion–Part 1
“Why can’t I get any respect? I am way too nice and I just give everyone too many chances and everything they want…I try to be balanced in life. I struggle; so does everyone. I want to make everyone happy but what about myself? I feel more confused about life than ever. I am sad, I love people so much and I try to always have the right intentions, I want to give people the benefit of the doubt, I hate crying at 7:30 am getting the double flip off fingers………………. I am not very good at curbing my personality to such strong personalities. I wish I knew the answer…. I just need to sit by the river and relax or something…………” These are the words of a mom who just got … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips
Feel Powerless in Parenting Your Teens?
What do I do if I have given up all of my parental authority to my kids and feel powerless? Your kids have you programmed. They know exactly how many times to ignore you before you get upset and lose it. You are constantly spending time trying to figure out how to say things to your kids without upsetting them. You are intimidated by the fear that your child will “melt down” and throw a fit. You find yourself apologizing for parenting your own teen. You are worried that your child will stop loving you. You’re arguing with your parenting partner about how to parent teens. You are stepping down to their level, yelling, crying and even swearing at them. They do what they want when they want, and you are … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips
Instructive Criticism in Parenting Teens
There are times when you have to give feedback, corrections or criticism. What if you are a boss , or a parent, or a husband or a wife, or a colleague, or a coach or a great friend? You love the person too much to not reflect your reactions? And yet criticism spoken to unwilling ears is useless, regardless of authority or consequences. And if it is spoken as a threat or a punishment, it ceases to be instructive all together. Well, there is a way to do this inside the parameters of being kind, nice and compassionate. It is called “instructive criticism”. What is “instructive criticism” and why is it better than other forms of criticism? “Destructive” or uncompassionate criticism sounds like; “You failed! You suck. You did that badly. You … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting teens, parenting tips
New School Year, New Story–Help in Parenting Teens-Part 1
We are on the cusp of a new school year. Whether you are parenting a teen, pre-teen or younger child, or for that matter a “young adult” here is some parenting help for you. New clothes, new binder, new hair-do, new look, new phone, new classes, new teachers, and on and on…..The theme of “new” comes up more and more as we approach the academic “d-day”. So why not a “new story” too! By a new story, I mean that each year, whether we continue at the same school, graduate or move to a new school, or move to a new area altogether, we start a new chapter in the story that is our life. In that “new story” we can give voice and intention to new ways that we want to … Read entire article »
Filed under: parenting advice, parenting help, parenting teens, parenting tips