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A response to the massacre at a grammar school in Connecticut

Why does it take an unthinkable, horrific tragedy to put things in perspective? Everyday challenges and struggles are our usual drama.  In parenting children, pre- teens and teens, we rarely encounter a day that is not filled with frustrating issues, incidents and difficult decisions. They seem big.  We make them big.  We make them huge.  We treat them as if our lives depend on their resolution.  We spar, bicker and argue.  We criticize and blame each other and try to make sense of the constant   trials and tribulations of parenting. We worry about finances, fearfully anticipate the cost of an unexpected car repair. We struggle with the eventuality of how we are going to pay for our teen’s college education. We multitask until we don’t know up from down, forward from backwards, right … Read entire article »

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Parenting Your Teens and Media-Part 3

Marshall Mckluen, the ‘60s visionary who wrote and lectured on the assets and liabilities of media and particularly television, pointed out that every new invention creates the possibility of making what preceded it obsolete. It depends on the conscious and unconscious intention. Power screwdrivers have been a great time and effort saver, yet we still find uses for a conventional screwdriver.  Cars are a daily necessity, and yet we still ride bikes and walk.  E-books and audio books offer incredible choices in keeping well-read, and we still buy books.  We can hear and see any kind of music in the world with audio devices, and yet we still pay high prices for live concerts.  In Mcluen’s illustration of the invention and subsequent societal saturation with the car, he suggests that we must … Read entire article »

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W.I.M.P? or, What is my part?

Here is some great advice for parenting teens.  You just had an argument with your son   or daughter, or even your father, mother, boss, colleague, teacher, friend, somebody-in-law.  In your mind, it is obvious that you are right, and they are wrong!  There is no question about it.  It is all their fault.  If it wasn’t for them there would not be a problem.  Ask anyone, it will be obvious that I am right.  I am waiting for an apology, this time it is clear, and I am not backing down. Do you recognize this internal conversation?  When parenting teens, it is almost never the total fault of one side.  Occasionally, you are 99.99% right and .01% wrong, but rarely 100%.  If you believe the magical thinking that you can be … Read entire article »

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